It's been a few years since I was on the earth, seems
a long time now. I can't begin to tell you how I've grown and healed. Back in the old days I felt like my whole world was
falling apart, unbelievable now , but really it was only like yesterday. Since I came over I've learned so much
about the human condition and how cold it can feel. I know now that even when I take into account the things that really hurt
me, for the most part the sadness was down to an imperfection of the chemical kind. I also realise with some certainty,
that in my earthly life I was well loved and supported by my family and my few true friends.
The illness that I had simply magnified the down
points emphasizing them in my mind - the nature of depression, the Black Dog. We've come such a long way
since my crossing over, it's all water under the bridge you could say. And what about that new bridge they built in my
old town? A plague of suicides already. Young people seduced by a instant of tragedy and romance, a moment in the spot
light, front page news, then gone forever, it's a shame. They could have been so much more if they had stayed. That space
needs clearing and healing, but it'll happen again. Suicide is a Siren calling disquieted minds to be dashed upon the rocks.
Leaving their loved ones forever asking why?
And for me you know that I feel I can forgive everything
now. I've since met others more cursed than me and they've moved on. Even the thing that hurt me most, my darkest secret.
I can at least set it aside (although not understand it), at least it doesn't haunt me now. They say revenge is a dish
best served cold, and I don't have the stomach for that anymore. And the girl? She left me standing in
the rain my heart torn in two and she denies any blame when asked. But there is still guilt there. Only she and I know how
it really was. Still, it's over and done, blown away by the tempest of time. Faded and scattered like autumn leaves. I can
forgive everything that once misused me now. And for this site, well I hope I can be a little more open, a little more free
with how I disclose myself. And maybe in doing that I can help others who walk the same path as quarry for the black dog.To
know that really, when all's said and done,, in the end we can all find peace.
Love and peace to you Richard
Dive
Do you know we come and go
like players in a scene?
Touching souls, embracing life
and restless in-between.
In flights at night and stars that shine
in moonlight, wind and rain.
With joy and spontaneaty
in sorrow tears and pain.
We touch the earth to learn the tricks
create the greater scheme.
Like broken flowers in a flood,
like moments in a dream.
(lyrics by Richard).
